Are YOU a hot mess?

“Mom, I’m a hot mess.” These are the words my 11-year old said to me on Thursday evening, as she was trying to plan out what she was going to wear for her musical performance at her school on Friday morning (a tribute to the 70s), and then what she was going to wear for the father-daughter dance Friday evening.

The very first thing I thought to myself was, “OMG! That’s too funny! How does she even know what that phrase MEANS???” Thank Goodness I didn’t laugh or giggle because as I looked into her eyes, I could see that she was truly stressed about all this. She was worried not just about what clothes to wear, but how she should style her hair, what jewelry she should wear, what my husband should wear to the dance, what her friends would think…

My very next thought was that she was too young to be stressing out about this kind of stuff. She’s only in 5^th Grade, for God’s sake! It made me wonder if I stressed out like that at her age. I’m sure I probably did but I have no recollection of it. (Mom, if you’re reading this, you’ll have to let me know. I’m blissfully ignorant at this moment of whether or not I freaked out as a kid over things that don’t really matter in the grand scheme of things.).

Part of being grounded and balanced, my theme for the month of May, is being comfortable with who you are. Knowing that you only need to worry about doing the things that make YOU happy, not everyone else. Since my blog entry from last week talked about these very things, it was easy to give my daughter some sound advice because it was still fresh in my mind. I told her to wear whatever clothes made her feel good about herself, and to wear her hair any way she wanted, as long as she didn’t violate dress code (not that I had anything to worry about on THAT front, but I always like to enforce the rules). In terms of what her dad would wear, I told her not to worry about that. The important thing was that they were doing something together, and it shouldn’t matter what you look like while doing it, as long as you’re having fun. The cool thing about it all is that I could tell she was actually LISTENING to me, because I could see relief flood over her as I told her not to worry so much.

Well, the two events ended up being a big success. Casey looked smashing at the musical performance in her overalls, neon-striped leggings and neon headband over crimped hair. She was dancin’ and groovin’ away to the awesome 70s songs they performed! As a matter of fact, I had a couple of parents come up to me afterwards to compliment her dancing skills during “We Are Family”.

And then for the dance that night, she looked absolutely beautiful in a black dress and little silver heels. Here’s a “selfie” she and Travis took of themselves at the dance:

Don’t they look so happy in this picture? AND they had a blast, which is the most important thing of all…they told me they danced the ENTIRE TWO HOURS! Both of them were completely exhausted when they got home, but had smiles from ear to ear.

So my plea to all you readers in Blog Land is to use this story as a reminder to enjoy life and stop worrying so much. We adults who end up getting caught up in the chaos of life, stressed out beyond belief…well, we don’t just magically end up that way, now do we? At some point in life, we stop being carefree and end up letting other people’s opinions matter more than they should. We end up trying to please everyone and end up not being true to ourselves many times.

On your mat this week, keep practicing in ways that foster being grounded and balanced. Move slowly, savoring the stability and the firm foundation in each pose you enter. If you wobble or fall in a pose, know that it’s OK. Just dust yourself off and try again. Eventually it will stick, and you’ll feel those roots really taking hold. And then…well, you just might be amazed by the things you’ll achieve!

Namaste,

Melanie